My book, The Happiness Experiment, describes making Gratitude Grants to 20 of the
beneficiaries in my Will. Rather than waiting until I died to give them a bequest, I brought the
bequest forward and made it a pre-quest. I offered each of these 20 people a large sum of
money. I wanted to be sure the money would benefit them, so I asked them for a thoughtful
Happiness Plan. When I read their Happiness Plans, almost every one of them involved their
homes. Some wanted to refurnish; others wanted to do limited remodeling; others wanted to do
an entire remodel; another wanted to buy a new home; and another wanted to build a new home
from scratch.
A house, a home, has a material aspect to it, but also a spiritual aspect. A home has a soul. We
enfold loads of values in our home – beauty (architecture and design), a garden, view, artworks,
books, photographs, pets, valuable documents, treasures – in a sense, our home is an expression
of, and an experience of, our life.
We live in a home by ourselves, or with a romantic partner, perhaps children, parents, pets – our
family. And… memories. Our home can be a place of beauty, comfort, security, joy – a soulful
sanctuary.
A home is a precious value. Thus, I am torn and conflicted to add a negative to this uplifting
post. But I believe the following contrast is helpful. Because a home is so full of values, losing
a home through divorce or fire is so devastating. To recover from the loss of a home, it can take
years and great psychological courage. (See page 101 of my hardcover book, The Happiness
Experiment.)
Recovery is possible. See the story of Asher and Catherine in Chapter 5 of the book in the
hardcover edition. It’s an inspiring story.
That’s my message: No matter the challenges, a happy home and happiness is possible. A home
can be a sort of little Heaven on Earth.
So, happiness begins with home.
Carl Barney
August 11, 2025
